a celebration of the "haven't i been here before" nature of depression
a mourning of darkness, a longing for light, but hopefully, in the end, a tale of survival.
sweetie--i hope you realize it's not your fault--after so many years of 'crap' it's okay to say/think these things--don't let yourself to get caught up in guilt/regret/what if's--you were the child--he was the parent--i'm not saying you shouldn't mourn this horrible loss, just don't get caught up in the other crap
i hope your alright and am sending you lots of love...
ha i meant it to be funny! I think it is hilarious, but after telling other people and seeing the look of horror on their faces, i figured out that people with 2 parents in relatively healthy family situations will never get it.
i'm not upset he died. i'm upset that my parent has passed and i feel nothing. It's not a terrible loss; it's like a neighbor who lives in your old apartment complex that you chatted with a few times dies.
funny thing is i think this was one of my dad's "get attention" actions that backfired on him. only so many times u can defy the odds and make a miraculous recovery. ah well.
i'm off to the non "service." i hope it is not a do it yourself cremation in the backyard, but knowing this family it might be. at least there will be good stories to share i am sure.
3 comments:
I hope you are ok.
sweetie--i hope you realize it's not your fault--after so many years of 'crap' it's okay to say/think these things--don't let yourself to get caught up in guilt/regret/what if's--you were the child--he was the parent--i'm not saying you shouldn't mourn this horrible loss, just don't get caught up in the other crap
i hope your alright and am sending you lots of love...
lyns
marie
ps sorry if i over-stepped here
ha i meant it to be funny! I think it is hilarious, but after telling other people and seeing the look of horror on their faces, i figured out that people with 2 parents in relatively healthy family situations will never get it.
i'm not upset he died. i'm upset that my parent has passed and i feel nothing. It's not a terrible loss; it's like a neighbor who lives in your old apartment complex that you chatted with a few times dies.
funny thing is i think this was one of my dad's "get attention" actions that backfired on him. only so many times u can defy the odds and make a miraculous recovery. ah well.
i'm off to the non "service." i hope it is not a do it yourself cremation in the backyard, but knowing this family it might be. at least there will be good stories to share i am sure.
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