i ran out of meds. it was my own fault because I wasn't paying attentiona nd then i thought i had a new script somewhere here but when i looked in the places i thought it would be - nothing! so then the holiday came and it went further. all total about 5 days sans lamictal. ehough to feel a lsight bump in the road, atleast that is what i am blaming it on. the other possibility (that i am slipping back) is not one i want to consider.
i've been thinking a lot about you all. do you ever feel bad when you feel better? it's like i don't have a right to be ok. well no, it is like we were all in the misery together so if we all aren't in the good together i feel bad - like i cheated or bribed someone or something.
i'm not going to overthink this. try to practice one of those negative thinking helpers they taught in the hospital. overthinking gets me into trouble.
now i am going to read, catch up on you all. Like an idiot i thought i had thrown away my bookmarks and then remembered they were on my old laptop in firefox 2 not in firefox 3.
2 comments:
Amazing how things can fall apart quickly when we are off meds even for a brief time. Hope you get back on your meds soon and feel better from it.
I do feel bad when I feel better because I think that my symptoms are in complete remission & I should be out being a productive member of society. It doesn't matter that I might again feel like crap in a few hours or the next day...but in those moments, it's almost as if I forget that I'm seriously ill. It's all or nothing.
Hope you were able to get your meds and you are just having a temporary bump in the road.
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